jimmybob dickhandler, world-class rumpmaster

muetbelette:

WHY DO RELIGIOUS FIGURES HAVE SUCH TINY WEENIES???

caravaggio’s angel’s weewee doesn’t conquer all.

PRUD’HON’S DUDE. look at it

michelangelo pls. it’s a micro peepee cmon

actually!!!!!!!!! this goes back to the greeks

according to the ancient greeks, having a big wingwong was considered bestial and lewd and sometimes even subhuman

it sort of meant that the dude had a difficult time controlling his sexual urges etc (stereotyping due to dick: officially old as balls)

and a teenie weenie was considered more beautiful and more idk cultured i guess the word would be, like you don’t think about sex all the time cos its just kinda lil and not controlling you like some kind of phallic puppeteer

which is why classical greek statuary dudes have itty bitty dongles

and the canon of dickular proportion just kinda went on through the ages cos everyone was just completely in boners w greece for like ever

so there you go

why arts have miniscule manmeat

an essay by vermouth